- Tabitha Caplinger
Hulu Betrayed Me
Okay, so maybe betrayal is a little dramatic. But that is how deep my television addiction goes. Here's what happened...
I got home from vacation, a time where I didn't watch much tv, if you can even imagine such a thing, and was ready to sit down and relax with one of my shows. I turn on the Apple TV and click on my favorite app, Hulu. I mean they got me. They understood what I needed for optimum television viewing. All my favorite shows were organized, new episodes ready in my queue. After a week of lake time and kids and driving and cleaning up vomit in a gas station bathroom (I'll save that for another post) I was ready for some quiet time.
But Hulu changed while I was gone. My beloved queue, the work of years of television obsession and OCD, was now replaced by the Watchlist. I proceeded with caution thinking it was just a name change, but no, my carefully plotted queue was now a mess of shows and little red icon badges. It was pure chaos and I DIDN'T LIKE IT!
Yes, I'm yelling and I'm sorry but I was caught off guard and I'm still processing the treachery of it all.
What's the problem you ask? Well, here is the problem. I have shows I love. I have shows I never want to miss an episode of. Those were worthy of the queue. They were the ones I wanted to see lined up in a pretty little ABC ordered row telling me, 'Hi, we love you and we have a new episode!'
Then there are shows I just like. I watch them when nothing else is available. When I'm bored. When it's summer and my beloveds are on hiatus. I don't want them in my queue. They have not earned it. Now suddenly they are all over this, this watchlist shouting at me with those red badges and shoving my precious ones to the bottom of the list.
To make matters worse there are shows I don't even like, shows I tried and they didn't pass mustard or shows that have been canceled and can no longer love me in return and these are also filling up my watchlist (please note I am saying this word in my head with disdain). They don't even have the manners to show up in alphabetic order, or to let me prioritize them based on my level of emotional investment. They are just there.
I DON'T LIKE IT!!!!
And, yes, I can remove a show from the evil watchlist. But I shouldn't have to. I should get to control my own television preferences, not you HULU! Here's why, because I know you are wondering. Hulu can't be trusted to tell me which shows I will like. I know this because they already suggest shows to me. They say they picked them just for me but they only prove that they don't know me at all. What shows up in their little "top picks for you"?
1. Korean Soap Operas. I have never watched a Korean Soap Opera. I don't watch regular soap operas since they changed Jason on General Hospital, and I DON"T SPEAK KOREAN!
2. Everything Anime. I HAVE NEVER WATCHED ANYTHING ANIME IN MY WHOLE LIFE AND I"M NOT GOING TO START NOW! ( I don't know why I shouted that but I'm upset.)
3. Jimmy Fallon Clips. Okay I'll give them that one because who doesn't love some Jimmy Fallon.
4. Anything Real Housewives, Kardashian, or Teen Mom. Just because I bingewatched every episode of Hoarders during a lost period after the Originals season finale doesn't mean I'm up for anything reality TV. No Hulu, NO!
I now find myself wondering why I am telling you all any of this. I guess I needed to get my frustration out. I feel better now. For the moment anyway. September is coming, the most wonderful time of the year when premiere week is upon us. (Except the CW, they don't premiere until October but it's usually my birthday week so I like to think they wait just for me. The CW gets me too.) We will see how things with the watchlist (still saying it with disdain) go when my beautiful darlings are back and my casual summer attitude is no more. We shall see Hulu, we shall see. And if I don't like it their will be wrath. (Probably not, but I will tweet them again and with a mad face emoji.)
UPDATE: I would first like to clarify that I have no issues with Korean Soap Operas or Anime. If you enjoy them than that is awesome and I am super happy for you but they are just not my thing. I felt like I might have come off judgy before and I didn't mean it. It's totally my personal preference and not a statement against those.
Also, since this post Hulu again changed the app and, if you can believe it, made it worse. Is it pretty to look at, sure. Is it functional, nope, not even a little bit. Finding my shows is more difficult and more time consuming. It's like the Hulu people didn't even read this post or any of my tweets.