- Tabitha Caplinger
I #LiveChosen - Zoe
*Disclaimer: Zoe is a fictional character from The Chronicle of the Three Trilogy. She is not real. But, I believe, there is still some truth to her struggles, while fictional, that could give us insight and encouragement in our own. You may proceed.
Some days I don’t want to be chosen anymore. It has cost me a lot. It’s painful and exhausting. I’m tired.
I know this probably isn’t what you were expecting, or wanting when you clicked on this. I should give you some inspiring words. I should tell you how awesome it is to be chosen for a purpose. It was, at first.
That’s how things work some times though isn’t it?
When you first start out you are full of passion and excitement and hope. You have this song playing in your head making you feel like everything is just going to fit smoothly together and nothing will go wrong, nothing bad will happen.
Then something bad happens. I mean if it was a little bad you’d be okay. You’d brush it off, adjust the volume on the happy song and keep strolling down your path. But it isn’t a little bad, it's a lot of bad, it's a big bad and it doesn’t just change the song, it crushes the radio. The music is dead.
When the music is dead how do you keep living chosen?
The weight of sorrow killed my song. After that, my path just looked dark and foreboding and being the Chosen One just seemed like too much for a seventeen year old girl to handle. Heck, it's too much for anyone at any age to handle, trust me.
The thing is, I’m not supposed to handle it.
I know that doesn’t seem to make sense but it's true. Sometimes we have to get to a place where we can’t hear the music to help us realize we needed a different song all along. (This place sucks, I’m not denying that. It doesn’t suck less knowing that even the dark places can serve a purpose. Just so we are clear.)
I don’t know what your happy song is. Maybe its popularity, acceptance, comfort, fame. My happy song was ease. I was willing to fight. I thought I knew what that meant. I thought that I had counted the cost of it but I realized I hadn’t. I wanted it to be cheap, I wanted it to be easy and when it wasn’t…well, no more happy song.
I think most of the time our happy songs are a little selfish. We are excited about our purpose. We are even stoked to be helping others, but we want it to be on our terms. We want to help as long as we don’t get hurt in the process.
I don’t think it works that way. Pain comes. It’s inevitable because we don’t see all the shadows, no matter how hard we try. Some of those suckers are sneaky.
I see them now though. I also see my selfishness. I see my need for a new song, a new anthem. This one won’t be about me. I’m not the source. Neither are you.
So yeah, sometimes living chosen is painful and exhausting. You’ll get tired. Remember it’s not about you. Relinquish control. Adjust your perspective. Change your tune.
Zoe is a character from The Chronicle of the Three Trilogy. You can read her story of learning she was chosen in The Chronicle of the Three: Bloodline. (Download a sample of #TCO3Bloodline for FREE.)
I hope you are enjoying this #LiveChosen bonus material as well as all the real life stories of some awesome people sharing what it means to #LiveChosen. There's still more to come, but don't forget to enter the GIVEAWAY!!!